Two and one half years ago I fell off my horse and broke my back. Not many people know this little tidbit of information. I guess I must have hidden it well at the time. It was the day before Halloween, 2008, and I was invited to take a lovely ride into the mountains in Idaho that brisk and sunny day. I was riding my horse, Rio, whom I had only ridden twice before since purchasing him in 2007. Only days after buying Rio, I had found out that I was pregnant with Rowan, and common sense dictated that I not ride my new horse with only 30 days of training while I was carrying a child. Consequently, I found myself a little over a year later, 3 miles up in the mountains on a narrow logging trail with a couple of friends, riding a very green horse. It was a beautiful day, and I paused for a moment to rest my right ankle and admire the tamaracks that were turning a beautiful shade of orange.
Unaware that we had stopped in a hornets nest, I blissfully removed my foot from the stirrup and rolled my ankle while contemplating the amazing view of the mountains. Well, you can only imagine that a nest of angry hornets attacking my horse's belly had an adverse affect on his calm demeanor, and he bolted. Unprepared for the sudden spook, I fell from my 16 hand horse and hit the ground hard. I remember attempting to get up several times, each time flailing around like a wounded bird, until I realized that I really was hurt, and that staying still might be a sound plan.
My horse came back and stood over me, apologetically, as if wondering "why are you down there? Did I do that?" After awhile, I was able to get up and climb back up in the saddle with help from my friend. I don't remember much of the 3 mile ride back down the mountain, but I do remember loading my horse in the trailer, and calling the vet clinic to tell them I would be stopping by for ibuprofen and ice packs. Wil met me in town and we drove to the ER, where they told me that I had torn muscles from my pelvic bones, and that time and rest would bring a full recovery. 10 months later I was still sore, so I finally had radiographs taken, which revealed a freaky congenital abnormality that had broken in the fall, and had since grown a weird butterfly shaped arthritic bony structure...this was the cause of all the pain. A few months later I worked up the courage to visit the MRI machine. I found out that two of the intervertebral disks were nearly gone, and two more were bulging out.
About this time I had the opportunity to send my horse to horsey boot camp with a friend's horse in Poulsbo, Washington. We decided to make the trek. We borrowed a trailer and loaded both horses for the nearly 400 mile journey. Coming down the hill into Colfax, a lady kept flashing her lights and honking at us, and I looked in my rear view mirror to see my trailer door fly open and cross multiple lanes of traffic. Panicked and using combinations of swear words that I had never thought possible, I pulled into a gas station (I did need gas) to make sure the horses were still alive. Watch out for those red concrete poles that guard the gas pumps, people, because they are trailer eaters. I smacked the borrowed trailer fender right into one of those poles, bending the fender nearly into the trailer tire. My friend and I stopped to consider the implications of this unlucky event on our journey. We nearly turned around and dumped the horses so that we could go to the bar, but we rallied and continued on after a nice man from the Grange came and used a crow bar to straighten the fender. About this time the brake and turn signal lights on the trailer gave out. We hit rush hour in Tacoma on I5 with no lights and in the middle of a rainstorm. After many near misses involving impatient people in Prius cars, we finally made it to our destination.
Last weekend we went back to pick up the horses. We rode for an hour under the instruction of our trainer, and headed for home. It didn't feel real, riding again for the first time in 2 1/2 years. At first I shook, and then I teared up, and then I felt it all coming back to me again.
Tonight we took our horses to the arena and I rode. I rode for real, without fear, and without hesitation. I could feel my muscles working they way that they were made to work, and I felt like I was a team with Rio, and it was wonderful. After the accident I felt fear of a horse for the first time in my life, and I think it is because I worry so much about my children. Tonight I had no fear, only exhilaration and an an awesome appreciation for a second chance at the amazing bond that can form between a horse and a person. Looking back I am so thankful that I have been blessed with the ability to be whole again, and to ride again. I know I have a long road to haul, but I am so thankful to have been given the chance to fall, and to get back in the saddle again.
